I might be a typical bleeding-heart liberal, but that all is eclipsed by the looming shadow of Whole Foods at 3rd Street and 3rd Avenue. That’s right, December 17th I will be first in line, if for no other reason than to be rid of the shackles of Union Market (crappy, expensive and waaaaaay too convenient). Sure, the character of the area will forever be changed, artists will be priced out, the traffic on 9th street and 4th Ave will increase, and there won’t be a lot of manufacturing done in the zone, despite the area’s original intended use. But as far as I can tell, New York specializes in perpetual change, re-invention and congestion, this is just the latest layer in the growing strata of Brooklyn (and 300 new jobs ain’t so bad neither). If we’re going to mourn over real estate let’s do it over the Domino factory or better yet old Penn Station (I can barely talk about this without tearing up). At least they saved the glorious, if structurally precarious, Coignet Building.
So, bring on the raw honey and Gorilla Munch, I will be baptized in Aromatic Butternut Squash Soup, born again the daughter of the big box store. And (said in a barely audible whisper) there will be parking (cue strings, light breaking through clouds). YUJI Ramen, roof top beer garden (serving, among others, Evil Twin beer), 52,000 square feet of impulse buys and my daughter’s favorite yogurt drink. Give in, embrace your truest self. There are no orientation slots at the co-op anyway. This is our new tomorrow.
Sarah Moriarty is a writer, editor and adjunct professor. Sarah’s writing has appeared in such hallowed places as her blog, her mother’s email inbox, the backs of Value Pack envelopes and a waist-high stack of mole skin journals. In addition, Sarah has contributed to F’Dinparkslope.com and edited fiction for Lost Magazine. An excerpt from Sarah’s novel, The Rusticators, is forthcoming in The Brooklyn Writers Space 2013/2014 anthology, The Reader. A resident of Brooklyn for the last eleven years, Sarah lives with her husband, daughter and a dwindling population of cats. Check out more of Sarah’s work at sarahmoriarty.com.