Our outer-borough brother Ryan Harrison, a former film history teacher with two daughters originally from Queens, gives us the low down on kids and smartphones, touch screens and attention-sucking technology.
Like any parent, I grumble when I see a group of children sitting in the same room, all deeply absorbed by their own personal electronic devices. Together in the same space, youngsters with earplugs and personal screens are more alone than at any time in history.
Sure, technology is wonderful, impressive and widespread — but it can also be absorbing, isolating and alienating. I see it contributing to a disconnect among children, and between kids and adults. It may seem like no big deal, but it can lead to other problems. One study by Penn State reported some of the detrimental effects attributed to over-reliance on technology are obesity, decreasing academic achievement, laziness, violence and inability to concentrate. I think it’s at least important to know some of the facts and where to set boundaries with my own kids.
The Gulf is Growing
My immediate reaction is to shake my fist at “the media” or “peer pressure” or any of my other go-to bad guys. But, who is really at fault? The wider world of human interaction is shrinking along with the globe. The more “connected” we become through the world of technology, the less it seems we share anything with one another on a meaningful level. Social media is not really “social” at all. It’s not really one contributing factor, but more of a global movement. Don’t misunderstand — I am not about to give up my smartphone. But, I am also not about to buy one for my six-year-old.
I saw a recent CBS News report that said a whopping 25 percent of toddlers as young as age two in the United States have smartphones. Toddlerhood, according to the experts, is a time for play, for the development of language, for the exploration of the world and for personal relationships. Using technology as a “babysitter” can stunt some of that progressive growth and normal behavior. “Screen time” is not white noise for a toddler, instead it is a flood of stimuli that is not soothing but overwhelming.
Technology as a Tool
Using modern technology as a tool is laudable, but when it becomes all-consuming, it takes on the attributes of addiction. There is some evidence that kids’ fascination with “screen time” exhibits hallmarks of physical addiction.
Now, I’m not going to go psycho and take away all the technology in our house. It can do a lot of good and God knows I am just as reliant on technology as the next guy. When I was a new dad I even searched out a diapering tutorial on YouTube, desperate times call for desperate measures. But for our kids, the question is really one of degree. A streaming movie can be a good way for kids to relax after completing mountains of homework. A game device can stall boredom during a long car ride.
Some families I know have proclaimed one or two days a week as family “tech-free zones.” From the time everyone gets home in the afternoon until bedtime, no television is allowed, no computer games, no social media and no digitized music or video. What it’s replaced by: family dinner and great conversation, perhaps a walk around the block or a group excursion for ice cream. While it’s great to do these activities, my goal for my family is to be able to have face-to-face time every day, not just one or two days a week. And it should be something we do naturally, not because mean old dad took away the phones and Playstation. It’s important to teach kids restraint and prioritizing relationships, so eventually they make the choice to put down the phone.
There are good reasons for older children to have smartphones, such as safety, responsibility, time management and independence.. But, at what age is it appropriate for a child to take on additional responsibility and independence, to learn how to manage his own time? More importantly, at what age does a parent abdicate the duty of assuring the child’s safety? Age in years is not as important as the capacity for reason. A smartphone is not a toy, and it is not a right; it should be an achievement bestowed following a demonstration of competence, much like a driver’s license, a job or the right to vote.
The technology trend will not be reversed, nor would we like it if it were. My advice would be to gauge your child’s readiness for something like a smartphone, and discuss preferences. Explore all your options. There are plans that allow limited internet access in the beginning, and most mobile providers offer smart phone options for every budget. Perhaps she can earn the money for additional services through chores. Supervise your child’s immersion in creative, clever ways. Finally, trust your instincts. You know what your child needs and what responsibilities she is truly ready for.
Ryan Harrison is a writer, teacher and father.