Stella Metzner shares her thoughts on finding (and maintaining) balance for yourself and your family.
Make your kid eat healthy too. My son will be the first person to complain about and nay say this section, but some day I know he will thank me. When I first had digestive issues and had to cut out gluten and sugar among other things I was packing my own lunch for work and eating super healthy. One day my friend asked me, “do you pack a lunch for you son?” and when I told her I didn’t. She said, “Well, why do you get to eat such healthy food and then you let him eat that crap?” She was talking about public school lunch, which has since improved a great deal, but is still not what I was eating. That got me thinking. Why was I doing that? I made him breakfast of usually whatever I could get him to eat, and I would make something else for myself. Then he had lunch at school and I would make my own, and then I would pull dinner together out of whatever was in the house that he loved and then I would make something healthy for myself. I was making 5 meals a day and he was eating crap. So then I made him healthy too. I didn’t force him to give up gluten and sugar, but I made something that mostly we could both eat and then on my plate I would sideline the things that I was having reactions to, and add more of the things that I could eat, like lettuce, or kim chi or beans and same for him. At first he was miserable, but we have a rule in our house in which he has to at least taste it. 8 times out of 10 he would actually really enjoy what we were eating, and if he didn’t, there was always a quick “healthy ramen” or something like that to make for him so he didn’t starve. Now my kid has a super healthy pallet, and totally enjoys the food I make. (but he won’t say it out loud) So many parents let their kids eat crap because it’s all they will eat. I had to eat whatever my parents made when I was a kid. I didn’t have a choice. I let my kid have a choice in the sense that we make stuff (he helps now) that we both like, and sometimes, on special days, or once a week, I let him eat crap! About a year ago he watched that movie “Fed Up” with me because he wanted to stay up late and watch something so I told him he would have to watch what I was watching. His mind was blown. He actually said, “Mom, I get why you want me to be healthy now.” He stopped eating sugar for about a week and now he’s totally addicted again, but compared to what a lot of kids out there are eating his sugar consumption is minor. Believe me, this is not easy. It takes a lot of self control and discipline, but the thing is, I’m not doing it in a harsh mean militaristic way. I’m doing it because, man, it makes me feel so much better, and it helps my son grow up strong and healthy and smart and vibrant. Sometimes being healthy is eating crap because it tastes good and its fun and we don’t do it every day. I also make sure to explain specifically why we don’t eat certain things. He gets it. He doesn’t want to have diabetes, or a thyroid condition or a sinus infection. He gets sick about once or twice a year, if that. And like I said before. He will thank me later.
Balance. I know that this is a lot of information to take in. It is years and years of trial and error and climbing and falling and reading and digesting, and even though we as humans for the most part don’t know anything, I think it is pretty good advice. The thing with advice is that we can only take so much, and that is ok. We take a little from here and from there and we try it on for size. If it works, awesome, if it doesn’t, try something else. It really is about balance. We want to try things and adventure and push ourselves to new heights and we need that. We need that extra zing of energy or that bit of healthy stress, or that bulletproof coffee in the morning. Sometimes we also need to take a step back, slow down, listen, take a nap, nourish ourselves, and eat a piece of chocolate or two. I’ve said it before in this article and I’m going to say it again and again. Just be nice to yourself. It’s ok to try and fall down and get up again. It’s ok to fall apart sometimes and put ourselves back together. Sometimes we need that so we can restructure and reboot and rebuild stronger. No one is perfect and no one has perfect balance all the time. We don’t want to strive for perfection because it is our imperfections that make us so much of who we are. However, seeking balance is different. Balance is light and dark, feminine and masculine, high and low, hot and cold, and sweet and salty. As parents we are asked to do this a lot. To be nourishing and caring at the same time as being disciplinarians, and teachers. If we can try to be balanced for and to ourselves, then we can show our kids by example how to be healthy. They need us to grow up strong and healthy and smart and vibrant just as much as we need them to.
Stella Metzner has worked as a fashion stylist for almost 20 years. In 2008 she developed health issues which inspired her to learn several healing modalities. She became certified in Reiki level 1 and 2 and has practiced it now for 5 years. She is also a certified Eating Psychology Coach after graduating school for Dynamic Eating Psychology and mind Body Nutrition and Coaching from the Institute for the Psychology of Eating http://psychologyofeating.com/