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Is it strange that the best parenting advice I’ve received so far came via my psychic? It was from a very dear and deceased family friend whom I saw as a father figure in my own father’s absence. He was a strong, loving, and deeply empathetic man. He raised two boys who have huge hearts and a great capacity for love and understanding. What he said was this: “When Jack (my son) comes home from school, instead of asking him what he did, ask him who he shared with, and who he helped. It will make him feel empathy, and teach him that those things are important to you.” Jack’s not yet two but he answers these questions with a classmate’s name, and an object that was shared. Usually he says “bagel,” which I think reflects more what he hopes will be shared–but we’re on the right track, I think.
(Editor’s note: This article was originally from 2015.)
There are picture books out there that help this conversation along. Here are some great ones about gratitude, sharing, bullying, pulling through tough times, showing kindness, and feeling empathy.
Last Stop on Market Street, by Matt De La Peña (ages 4-7)
Gratitude. This is a beautifully illustrated book about CJ and his grandma, and their regular trip across town on the city bus. CJ wonders why they don’t have a car or ipods, and laments the mess and garbage on the streets. His grandmother helps him find the beauty in the world around them, and especially in their time together.
It’s Mine by Leo Lionni (ages 2-5)
Sharing. “Stay out of the pond,” yelled Milton. “The water is mine,” shouted Rupert. “The earth is mine.” Yup, this is a conversation worth having. We have to share this earth, and treat it better.
Bully, by Laura Vaccaro Seeger
Bullying is such a hot-button issue these days, that there’s actually been a huge number of picture books written on the subject. I like this one because it’s simple, non-preachy, and easily adaptable to a specific scenario you may want to discuss. I like that the fact that bullies indeed have feelings too is not ignored.
A Chair for My Mother, by Vera B. Williams (4-7)
Tough times. This is a beautiful story about how change can impact families, and how communities can pull together in good times and bad to help each other. It’s an emotional portrait of a family, and helps children realize that even wh
en there are differences between you and others, there are also many important similarities.
The Lion and the Mouse, by Jerry Pinkney (ages 3-7)
Kindness. In this wordless adaptation of a classic Aesop fable, we learn through beautiful illustrations that kindness begets kindness. Let your child tell you the story, and come to that conclusion on their own.
Bear Feels Sick, by Karma Wilson (ages 3-7)
Empathy. Getting sick is something kids know about, but caring for friends or family who are sick? Maybe not so much. This adorable story shows a forest family caring for their sick friend, and we learn how important caregiving is to friendship, family, love, and life.
Jessica Ralli coordinates early literacy programs for children 0-5 at the Brooklyn Public Library, and has an MA in Early Childhood Education from Teachers College, Columbia University. In her spare time, she likes making stuff and going places with her very active almost 2 year old son, Jack. Jessica lives in Brooklyn (15 years and counting) with her husband, son and their whippet/lab mix named Mia. Her opinions are her own and do not reflect those of BPL. She tweets her early literacy adventures at twitter.com/jessicaearlylit.
Looking for a great place to get these books? Try your local library, or if you’d rather buy them, I like Books of Wonder and the Bank Street Bookstore in NYC. (Editor note: This article contains affiliate links but we still think you should visit stores and buy them in person if you can. Please note, these affiliate links are not associated with the author or the library.)
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